The Danger in Riding Fences

When I write, I spend a lot of time staring at a blank screen.

I also spend a lot of time suffocating the little key on my laptop known as "backspace."

The delete key wins honorable mention, but only because it's what backspace should have been named.

And in all of this staring and key-mashing, I find myself frustrated, wallowing in my own destructive self-talk.

No, that's not good enough.

BACKSPACE

Why would people be interested in that?

DELETE

You'll never "make it" with lame ideas like this.

UNDO

And the negative self-talk persists. No matter how many posts I write or how many people read my words, those doubts creep up on me each time I'm trying to decide on the words that will fill my screen.

I realized something the other day, though. Something that helps. It doesn't heal the negativity I have toward myself (and that's another series of posts for another week entirely), but it keeps me from getting ugly.

So what did I realize?

The easiest way for me to nip my defeating self-talk in the bud is to simply make a decision.

This is one of the hardest things for me to do in life. Ask anyone that knows me (especially my wife). I'm often chained down by indecision because I don't have enough confidence in myself to believe that I could actually be doing something correctly.

But what I realized the other day is this: oftentimes, when I'm deciding between one thing or another, the results of choosing one or the other won't be nearly as devastating as choosing neither.

Step away from the fence, people.

Case in point: I've been aching over buying a camera lens forever. I finally decided on one two days ago, and I still have doubts about my choice. But if I kept riding the fence and "playing it safe," I was going to be losing out on precious opportunities to use a new lens to capture memories - the whole point of my photography.

Not deciding was worse for me than choosing either of the options, and this is often the case with most decisions in life.

So today, learn from my mistakes. Make a choice, jump off that fence, and destroy it while you're down. The danger in riding fences is that they get you nowhere, and they get you there fast.

I don't know what decision you need to make to today, but I do know that making one is better than making none. Figure out what decisions you're avoiding in your life and do. something. about. them.

... ... ...

Questions: What sort of decisions have you been avoiding? Why have you avoided choosing a side? What is there to gain from riding the fence? 

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photo credit: raZna - sxc.hu

Just Do It

This past month has been insane.

I mean, sure, there was that whole Christmas thing. And then New Year's. And finishing last semester. And starting this semester.

Minor details. 

No, what I'm talking about doesn't concern school or holidays. What I'm talking about is life.

Over the last month or so, I've set some pretty lofty goals for myself:

Gain 30 pounds. 

Stop drinking soda. 

Spend less than five minutes a day on Facebook.

And the list goes on.

And as I've pursued these things, I've been doing a lot of reading. A lot of reading. On weight gaining. On blogging. On spirituality and what it means to accept the Bible for what it is and not what I want it to be. On photography. On living my life to the fullest. And so, so much more.

And you know what I've found that's helped me? Frankly, very little.

You see, as I'm working toward truly living life every moment of every day (as opposed to simply existing and letting life happen to me), I'm learning. I'm learning what works for me.

The thing is, I read a thing here and there about what to do for this and that. But ultimately, it comes down to me actually living and finding out what works for me - not just what I think sounds good to me.

Sure, I love reading. It's great for learning and great for leisure. And I love learning and enjoying myself.  But learning and leisureliness do not equate with living.

In this last month, I've learned that in order to find what works for me, I actually have to take the risk of failing in order to discover success. And I think this is something that could be said for you as well.

Want to be a big-time blogger? You don't have to post 5 times a week, or even once a week. There's no magic formula. Find what works for you and do it.

Want to live a healthier lifestyle? You don't have to exercise 4 hours a day. You don't have to be a vegan. You do have to find what works for you and do it.

Want to write a book? You don't have to wake up at 5 AM everyday or stay up until 3 AM every night. If it's not your thing, don't do it. Find what works for you and... yup, you guessed it: do it.

I know I sound like a Nike commercial right now, but it doesn't get much simpler than that. If you're looking to live a richer, more fulfilling life right now, then stop reading, stop seeking the "right way." Figure out what it means for you to live a fulfilled life and just do it.

... ... ...

Questions: What is holding you back from achieving your goals? Why do you fear the risk of failure? How will you live a more fulfilled life in your own personal way today?

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There's a Hole in the Bucket...

... dear Liza, dear Liza.

This is me when I run out of blogs to read.

Just kidding.

I'm not here to sing you a catchy song.

Or even to write a catchy post.

Instead, I'm going to let you take the spotlight today.

Yup. You.

I fear there may be a hole in my good ol' bucket o' blogs, because it's running dry.

And when I don't have many blogs to read, I get sad.

So whether you're young or old, rich or poor, a native to this blog or a new reader, I want you to leave a comment with your a blog that you're really loving right now.

It can be about anything. Circuses. Parades. Circuses in parades! I'm not picky, I promise.

Let me have it! And thanks in advance!

Concerning Mrs. Hatmaker

Jen Hatmaker is wrecking my life.

It started about five days ago.

Somehow, by some supernatural force, Mrs. Hatmaker weaseled her way into the life of one of our best friends. And somehow, someway, she convinced our friend to convince my wife to convince me to participate in the challenge presented in her book 7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess.

Jen Hatmaker is a very convincing woman, apparently.

When she wrote this book in 2011 she knew. She just knew that she was going to ruin me.

First of all, she's starting by taking away my sacred Sundays and forcing me to spend it resting. And actually going to church! Ridculous, I say! I'm American! I work every day, around the clock, and only stop for coffee!

And then there's this this prayer nonsense we're doing as a part of the chapter on stress. She's treating it like it actually matters. Apparently she missed the memo that we get when we become Christians that says, "We only say we'll pray - God doesn't actually expect us to do it." Who actually wastes time with such an antiquated ritual, anyway?

And seven times a day?! What are we, monks? C'mon, Jen. I have really important stuff to do, like checking my Facebook compusively throughout the day. If I'm praying seven times a day, how do you expect me to know every intimate detail of my friends' lives?

And while I'm thinking of it: I love the number seven. But now, something tells me I'm going to grow to hate it. Just one more thing to thank Jen Hatmaker for...

And this stinkin' book just. keeps. going. 

After the stress chapter I have to basically stop eating food for a month, only getting to choose 7 foods to eat.

And then after that I have to dress like a flippin' hobo, only getting 7 pieces of clothing to wear.

And then Mrs. Jen attacks my spending habits. And my sacred media. And my possessions. And my waste (which I obviously have none of - c'mon, Jen). This is my life, Mrs. Hatmaker, and I'm not sure why you insist upon ruining it for oh, so long.

Will the mutiny ever end?!

This is gonna be a tough one, people. I'm thinking I'm going to have to add this challenge to my 52 in 2012 (which I guess would make it 53). If I don't make it, you'll know who to thank. But before you do, let me be the first to say it:

Mrs. Hatmaker, you've officially ruined my life, and for that, I thank you.

... ... ...

Questions: What do you think about the idea of simplifying your life? Do you think we live in excess? What's so bad about having so much? How can you simplify your life today?


Interested in the book? I'm giving it my highest recommendation - a billion stars out of a billion. BUY IT! (And no, I get nothing for this - Jen Hatmaker and her publisher have no idea I exist)

De-Lurking Time!

photo credit: wizard - sxc.hu

Alright, people.

I know you're out there.

I have my ways - trust me.

With that being said, it's time to come out of the darkness for a moment. Just a moment, I swear!

Get out of that shell and leave a comment!

Say hello, let me know you exist, and then you can go back into hiding. And if you regularly comment, feel free to comment as well!

Let's make this an epic National Delurking Day get-together!