Doing Something Harder

Note from Adrian: This is a guest post from my friend, Natalie, who echoes my heart 100% in almost every area of life. Natalie is a Christ-follower, a newlywed, an orphan advocate, an almost-official social worker, and a lover of all things cute and artsy. She live in St. Louis City with her curly-haired husband where she blogs and tweets about little things and big stuff.

(Want to write a guest post for Life Before the Bucket?)
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For me, living life to the fullest has meant different things at different times. But I don't think I've done it well until lately. And even now, I seem to face decisions in increasing frequency when I feel myself want to choose the less "full" choice.

I'm currently in the last month of my graduate program. In May, I will hold in my hands a Master's in Social Work. You can do a whole lot in social work. While most people think of middle aged white women coming to the door of poor families to snatch away their kids, I've learned social work also involves running youth programs, providing activities for the elderly, and advocating for or against policies.

As I search for a job, I feel myself desiring a 9a to 5p job with a cushy salary, frequent rewards, and little stress. Those social work jobs are out there. And because I have a background in journalism, those jobs are always on my mind, too. Working in front of a computer at a magazine? Sure! But I know the clear voice of a God who has been calling me to more for the past three years. I desire to work with families who have lost all respect from society. I desire to advocate for vulnerable, hurt children. I want to work in foster care.

I'm glad to be underpaid and overworked in the name of advocating for the best interests of a child. I'm glad to be called at all hours to address crises that arise when emotionally hurting kids are expected to act "normal." After all, we are called to "speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves" [Proverbs 31:8]. God has given me the faith and the resources to not only survive, but excel, at doing something harder. At speaking up. He has taken my idol of comfort and security and pushed it a bit further from my reach.

While social work is what I know I am called to do right now, I also know there will soon be a time when I am called to be a mom. I feel this most wonderful, scary, uncomfortable desire to adopt kids from hard places. Kids who have experienced great loss and whom very little may be known about. And this is okay with me.

I will not boast in my plans, but instead keep an ear out for God's. And even when I think I know His plans for my husband and me, I will continually submit them to Him. I will have constant conversations with Him. I will whisper to Him when I feel the uncomfortableness creeping in.

"Come now, you who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit'— yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, 'If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.'” [James 4:13-15]

What is life if I don't feel uncomfortable sometimes? What is life if I don't feel stress and worry once in a while? What is life if I don't say, "if the Lord wills"?

To me, this is living life to the fullest.

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Questions: What hard things do you feel called to do? What scares you most about those hard things? What have you done lately that was uncomfortable, but worthwhile?

This guest post was part of a guest post series called "Living to the Fullest." Interested in joining in? I'm still looking for submissions! Just write up a post, or even just an idea, and e-mail it my way!