A Smidgen of Regret

The internet I'm using right now is being as spastic as a chihuahua on Red Bull. So I apologize for any weirdness that might happen, including the random change in font for this post. Blame the chihuahua.

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 Have you ever done something and immediately regretted it? 

I know I have.

In fact, it happened here, on this very blog.

I wrote something, posted it, and immediately regretted it.

This wasn't the "Crap, I wrote a hateful post about Justin Bieber and need to apologize because that's what Christians are 'supposed' to do," kind of regret.

Nor was it the, "I don't know why I said the death of Osama bin Laden was a good/bad thing," kind of remorse.

It wasn't even the, "Crud, my wife is eventually going to read this," kind of mistake. And that one happens a lot.

And though I felt the sting of regret after hitting the "Publish" button for what I wrote, I definitely know I needed to share it. But that doesn't make me feel any less embarrassed.

So what is it? Well, if you keep reading, you'll find out.

The Evolution of Failure

So it's 7 AM, and I just learned the word "chronobiology." Since I already learned something new today, can I just skip to tomorrow?

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"Fail" is a funny word. It's one letter away from being something shiny and fun to play with (foil, in case you were wondering) and about 53 letters away from being my all-time favorite meal (steak, mashed potatoes, and corn on the cob with a cold can of Pepsi - but you already knew that). 

Oddly enough, this word has been transformed into something almost positive in the last few years. It started as a simple way for a teacher to crush a student's hopes and dreams and has evolved into something of a buzzword that usually describes events that are so ridiculous that they actually aren't failures because they're so stinking funny.

Exhibit A: Failure that's actually failure.

Exhibit B: Funny failure, and therefore, a win, which isn't failure at all.

I fail on a daily basis. This is no surprise, because recent testing has shown that I am indeed 110% human. This leads me to believe that I could have probably created FailBlog, but instead of doing that and becoming filthy rich, I probably decided to take a nap or something. Priorities, people. Needless to say, I failed and created Life Before the Bucket instead. I'll get over it.

A couple of days ago, I failed twice in approximately five minutes. 

I'll let you decide if they were winning fails or failing fails.

If You Love Me, You Will...

Saw a new doctor yesterday. He had a Keurig in his waiting room. Don't care what he charges or what he does - he's a keeper.

Tell me you've never seen this conversation play out before...

Love-Struck Girl: What are you doing tonight?

Clueless Boy: Watching the Royals get creamed by the Indians. Why?

Love-Struck Girl (Who Happens to Be Clueless About Baseball): We should go shopping!

Clueless Boy (Who Clearly Has Plans for the Night): Well, I'm busy. I'm watching the game, remember?

Quickly-Falling-Out-of-Love Girl: C'mon, just this once. I promise.

Not-So-Clueless Boy: Didn't you say that last week?

Definitely-Out-of-Love Girl: But... Well... If you love me, you'll go with me!

Clueless Boy: I... Uh... Well... 

Love-Struck Girl: Great! Pick me up at 7!

Puzzled and Clueless Boy: How DOES she do that?

You know what I'm talking about. Whether it's been with your spouse, your child, or your best friend, you've probably been in this situation before. One of you wants something that the other clearly doesn't care about. In a futile attempt to appeal to their heart, you guilt-trip them and get what you want, knowing that you'll get what's coming to you in the near future.

Life Goal Achieved: Learn to Read Greek

So I just realized I'm eating some Easter jelly beans and I'm supposed to be working out soon. Don't judge me!

Ah, sweet summer solace. It's so nice to be free. Free from 8 AM classes, deadlines, expectations, responsibility, paying bills... Okay, so not quite that far. But seriously, it's great to be out of school for a few months. I feel bad for people that take classes year-round, honestly. But more power to 'em - they'll be my boss someday, I'm sure. Meanwhile, I'm enjoying the freedom that is summer.

This summer is especially freeing, in my mind. This may have something to do with the fact that over the last three summers I have traveled to Sierra Leone, gotten married to the love of my life, and traveled to Taiwan. Ya know, the usual.

Like I said, though, this summer is going to be nice. I mean, all we're doing is completing our internships, which sounds like a lot bigger deal than it is. I promise. Internships got nothin' on airport security in Taiwan. Those beagles don't play!

Scary stuff, right?

More Shameless Plugging

So it's Sunday morning, and I'm awake before the sun rises. This is old news to most anyone who has read this blog at some point or another. Unless I take sleeping pills, I just don't sleep. 

However, today is different. 

Today, I have strict instructions on what I am to do once I'm awake - which I guess is now. And if I remember correctly, those instructions had nothing to do with blogging and everything to do with cleaning and packing so that we can move for our internships. 

Oops.